It is common knowledge that no renovation adheres to schedule or budget. I just didn’t realize it would go off the rails quite so quickly. The contractor went from, let’s start the demolition tomorrow to maybe we can start in two weeks. In all honesty, it is my own fault.
I didn’t follow up on the engineer drawings needed for the permits. The contractor thought I was handling it; I was waiting to hear from him if he wanted me to handle it, and my kitchen designer thought someone was handling it. Only when all three of us were together for the “final” (ha!) walk through did it come to light that no one had handled it.
So now we wait. In some ways I’m thrilled because it takes the pressure off me to tie up all the loose ends, not to mention it gives me more time to figure out how to make a livable space out of the areas that aren’t going to be demoed.
Fortunately I didn’t postpone my weekend visit with my daughter who has just relocated from the East coast to the Northwest. I loved her new town. The Sunday Farmers Markets was one of the best I’ve seen, and I’ve seen plenty. The weather was perfect. The pace soothing. I’m gong to enjoy visiting her often.
The visit was also a revelation. There are many instances when, as a parent, you feel your child slipping away – when they take their first step, when they start school, when they no longer want you to hold their hand, when you are asked to drop them off a block from school so no one sees you and, of course, when they leave home for college or other pursuits.
However, after each of those gut wrenching experience, they will turn and hug you or snuggle or ask for help, showing that they still need their mom (or dad). This trip was the first when I really felt that my daughter was a wholly independent person who needed an ally not a mom. She’s proven that she is braver than I ever will be. I can’t imagine leaving a city, a home, a job and friends to venture into the unknown – but she’s done just that. She’s navigating roads that she alone has traveled. If she stumbles, I can’t kiss it and make it better. I can’t step in and fix anything. I can only be there for her as her biggest fan and greatest ally. If there comes a time when she wants her mommy again, I’ll be there ready to step back into those familiar shoes. Until then, I’m happy to be in her life and have her in mine.